Muddling through. . .

. . . because I don't really have any other option.



When I last left I was in the hospital with Mom.  I was spending the night so I could catch the doctors who made stinking early rounds.  That night turned into a nightmare, mom so crazy and confused arguing with me, nurses, and saying she was going to get up and leave.  At one point of the night I told her if she could get her ass out of bed and walk as far as the door I'd bring her home right then and there - of course she couldn't do it.  I remember one point being in the hallway in the middle of the night near tears with the nurses because she was so out of kilter and crazy.  That morning I stayed till near noon and did manage to catch some doctors.  Stent surgery was scheduled, Mom was convinced I was demon spawn, and I'd had enough of the crazy and went home.  When I got home I handed Hubby my cell phone and told him I was only home for medical professionals and went to bed.  While I was sleeping Mom blew up Hubby's phone and he went to the hospital to try to calm her down.  I woke up several hours later confused if it was 6:00 am or pm and came downstairs to find the kids had made their own PB&J for supper and were happily gorging on video games.  Hubby managing mom, texted reports that she was certain she was in a fire station and that a cat was in her hospital room.  After CAT scans and blood work they finally came to the conclusion that she was seriously sleep deprived and gave her a tranquilizer.  The next morning Hubby and I went to the hospital early so we could be there during the stent procedure and despite having only about 4 hours of good sleep we saw marked improvement in her mental function.

The stent procedure went well.  They implanted four stents which cleared blockages that were up to 95%.  The next day or two later she was subjected to an electrophysiology study that concluded that all the blackout episodes were a result of the blockages.  A few days later and Mom was sent to a intensive rehab unit in the hospital.

After about a week in the rehab unit I don't see huge improvement within her.  In fact I see her mental state deteriorating almost daily.  After initial evaluations the rehab team had estimated her a release date of Jan 21, today they moved it back to the 28th and frankly say they are not even sure about that.

In the meantime I've managed to get her some insurance through the "Obamacare" which will start on Feb 1.  The hospital was overjoyed when I told them that today as they were not comfortable releasing her home and honestly I'm not up to taking care of her.

Mom is terribly incontinent both bowel and urine and doesn't actually feel herself going.  Worrisome as nerve damage is feared and the medical team wants to do an MRI, normally not a problem however she has a metal clip in her brain and nobody really knows if it's MRI compatible.   I googled around a bit today and found out how the hospital can get her records from the hospital that did the surgery back in '99 and called to confirm that those records exists. 

Battling a migraine and sick of looking at Christmas decorations I took the day off from going the hospital and spent it packing up the tree and other stuff.  It's all neatly stacked in the dining room waiting on Hubby to hall it down to the basement.  I'm glad to have it down, this is probably the latest I've ever had decorations up as I usually take them down on New Year's day.

I other than Mom news...  Sonny Boy was officially hating wrestling.  It seems as though he was paired with a couple of boys who are a few levels ahead of him and practices were going tough with him spending a lot of time on his back.  Sonny Boy was sick of it and declared he wasn't going to do tournaments this year and was looking for excuses to not go to practice.  Hubby e-mailed the coach who made sure to pair him with a lesser opponent last night and it's 180 degrees and now he's planning on going to a tournament this Sunday.  While I pretty sure Sonny Boy isn't the next Olympic wrestler I think he's scrappy enough to do well with it, so I'm glad he decided to stick with it for the time being.  If nothing else wrestling gives him a good outlet to vent his frustration physically which is really important to him.

Igor is trudging along being Igor.  I was trying to line out violin lessons for him so he could have his own "thing" since most sports are out of the question for him.  However with the Mom fiasco and luck would have it that the violin teacher I had spoken with is dealing with a cancer diagnosis with her husband, it hasn't happened.  In the meantime Igor is adamant he doesn't want violin lessons but does want  piano lessons.  I really have no issue with piano lessons except the fact I do not have space ANYWHERE in my house to put even the smallest piano.  That's on hold for now and in the meantime I'm trying to talk him into violin at least long enough to start learning to read music.

Work is going well for both Hubby and I.  My new job is somewhat boring but so low stress and  so easy it's silly.  I mostly stamp, sticker, and cover new books and DVD's.  I work two full days and one half day a week and I like the schedule better than just a few hours everyday.  The two full days seem incredibly long.  Currently Hubby has been able to come home and pick up the kids after school on my work days.  When I took the job I was doing it with the idea that Mom would be around to be a warm body sitter.  Now I don't know what I'll do.  We are going to have make better arrangements soon, hopefully I can find a responsible high school girl in the meantime.  I'm thankful that Hubby's job allows him the opportunity to come home and do this.  While my income certainly isn't keeping us afloat, I really enjoy having a job where I get to see adults and have a life outside of kids and mom.
 
Now I muddle through.  Today I asked Sonny Boy if he noticed anything different (meaning the tree was down) and in his ever present, inherited, learned and sometimes appreciated smart ass-ness he said "you're upright?"  Yeah, when I'm home I'm usually asleep or looking like mummy in my couch throw in the chair.  I tell ya, the ever present pull I'm should be at home doing something while I twiddle fingers at the hospital, the two hour round trip to get there and back, and the guilt of not being at the hospital when I'm not there is killing me.