Just when you think it's getting calmer...

The last few doctor appointments Mom has had I have sent her on her own.  Frankly they have become very routine with just about the same things asked, said, and gone over.  Therefore when Mom had a doctor appointment with the family doc the other day I didn't think much of it, honestly figuring if anything popped up crazy the doctor would call me.  Well the family doctor didn't call me but sent Mom over to the cardiologist.  The cardiologist started running tests which Mom brushed off as no big deal, they are just checking me out.  I stupidly thought that they were just being a little over-cautious and kept trucking. 

I was wrong.

When I got off work the other day I had a message on my phone from Mom to come by  "We need to talk".  I was worried as I did know that they had called her in after running a test and she wouldn't let me go with her.  Quote "I'm a big girl".  Well the "big girl"  had evidently passed out a couple times and her heart arrhythmia is getting bad enough to cause these episodes.  Mom never told me for fear I would make her move out of her house.  The doctor and the nurses crawled all over her for not telling me, for not bringing me to the appointment and so on and so forth.  Now, with Mom's consent I am now handling the scheduling and understanding of her heart condition, which frankly I have to dumb down to a 10 year old level for her.  Last week I spent an entire day at the cardiologist office while they ran some more tests that indicated a possible blockage. I had to call into work because it became apparent I wasn't going to make it there.  Week after next Mom goes in for a heart cath.  She's actually freaked out enough to try and quit smoking.

Honestly, I can't get too emotional about it.  I'm worried of course, but I just see this as the beginning of long downhill of health decline that I knew was coming.  I'm glad she's nearby so I can manage things, and frankly I feel the healthcare here is far superior to what was available in her area.  I worry about the nightmare of medical bills.  The hospital has been terrific with their charity program, I have applied for the state medical program but haven't heard from them.  I worry that her small nest egg will keep her from that - she might be better off it was gone.  I'm sure just the amount of tests in the last couple of weeks would easily eat it up.  "Obamacare" isn't a help yet as even if I could get her enrolled it won't kick in until the start of the year, though I suppose I should try to navigate that website and see what's available.

Thanksgiving I have refused to cook.  I'm trying to find somewhere to make reservations.  Hubby leaves for France the Saturday after, with the amount of stress dumping on me I'm not adding a turkey to it.