Used to be that Teachers were ALWAYS Right

When I attended my small southern town’s public school district around 20 years ago it was ruled with an iron fist. Students who stepped out of line were punished, a paddle, a stint in “resource room” which in most places is called in school detention, or worse a phone call and meeting with your parents. It was the phone call home we all dreaded most. As kids we knew the paddle only stung for a few minutes, the in school detention was miserably boring, but there would be hell to pay if mom or dad had to come to the school and speak with the principal, and usually the punishment at home was way worse than the punishment at school.

Now of course there is no longer paddling, maybe the in school detention is still there – I don’t know- but I do know that students no longer fear that phone call home. I don’t think this is unique to my hometown, but is common in all areas regardless to the affluence of the school district boundaries. Why is this? Why is it that students no longer fear their parents being brought to the school for disciplinary action? Many people I know in the education field tell me it’s because suddenly a child can do no wrong in their parent’s eyes.

Why is it that parents would automatically assume their child in the right? Cripes, just yesterday my 8 year old wonked his little brother on head with a Wii remote – in front of me – for no apparent reason at all, and then lied to my face that he did not do it. Now of course if he’s going to lie when he knows I saw what he did with my own two eyes, don’t you think he’s going to try to squirm his way out of trouble and blame other parties if I didn’t see it? Of course he is, he’s a kid, and that’s is what kids do.

Sometimes there is the rare occasion that you have to play momma bear and stand up for your children. I will admit that occasionally teachers and school administration are wrong, but I do believe that those instances are not all that common, particularly when dealing with disciplinary actions. I also believe that parents often jump to conclusions before hearing the entire story – from an adult – and the child sees that mom is going to go up to the school with a snoot full of righteous indignation before the whole story is even heard. Don’t you think you owe it to the education professionals to work with them, and to not automatically take little Bobby’s side? Isn’t it simpler to just tell Bobby that you will discuss things with the principal before getting your dander up? Your child’s teachers deserve the respect of their students, regardless to your opinion of her/him, and by automatically believing an 8 year old over an adult erodes that respect immediately.
While my 8 year old is far from perfect at school – he does get into some minor trouble here and there, none of it has even prompted a note home from his teacher, he does get a stern warning from me and the promise that if the behavior continues he’ll have consequences at home as well as at school. Does his fear of losing screen time and an early bedtime keep him in line, I don’t know, but so far the bluff is in on him and as long as he assumes he’ll never watch TV again if I’m called to the school, so much the better.